Summer so Fa!

so my summer adventure so far... well right now it consists of work and then then sleeping and that is about it. At work i search for standing water ( the stuff the doesn't move or flow) where skeeters lay their eggs and then those eggs go through the life cycle and then become blood suckers lol. I drive round in a truck tons from spot to spot where you dip a white enamel cup into the water look at the water you bring up which has lots of bugs and weeds etc. then if there are more then 4 larva in the dip you treat the water, but you dip in about 6 different spots to see how big of an area you have to treat. Each day I see a variety of animals ranging from cows, dogs, horses, tons of bugs including gross ticks, mice, rats, spiders, groundhogs, gofers, owls, snakes three different kinds, bunnies, tadpoles, and i think that is about all of them, but it is cool to see new things and explore a lot of the area around where i grew up i find cool places to go all the time :) Also at work we break apart beaver dams all the time because they make the go from flowing to standing which creates a lake for breeding mosquitoes. It is pretty crazy!

I am enjoying being home with my family but it has pros and cons just like everything else. I am in a singles ward for church meeting new people and trying to find fun things to do. It is nice to chill with my siblings and parents when they are not in school or working. I am also getting a pretty great tan. I spend most of my time outside each day except for sunday. We are growing strawberries like mad so i spend a decent amount of my free time there. lol. We just planted more apples trees and put in a sprinkler system all around my house. It is pretty exciting but strange because home is changing as time goes by but nothing stays the same all the time. At least a few things are consistent like the grass always grows and there is always food I can eat here. lol.

Also I listen to the radio all the time at work cause we have the truck that doesnt havea tape deck or a cd player... but there is a song by nickelback that has made me think a lot about where and waht i want to do with my life its called "If today was your last Day." If you want something motivational here is a link to watch the video and listen to it... its most of the song and its a clean video and sends the message well...

http://www.mtv.co.uk/artists/nickelback/video/if-today-was-your-last-day

Anyways, that pretty much sums up things going on with me. and sorry it took so long to post again, many crazy things happened at school and life, but now things are slowing down a little.
Have a happy day!

stand in the rain...

Off to a rough start this new semester...
somethings seem to just be a waste of my time. I feel like I am giving it my all, my time, my effort, my mind, my heart, my strength, everything I got and its still not enough. Where did I go wrong? So I am starting over with the new year, I am going to get a new life. Make changes. Rely on myself. Be who I really want to be. and I am facing my worst fears, getting the strength to pick myself up off the ground, so I can stand in the rain. There is a song by Superchick called stand in the rain that says :

" She never slows down
She doesn't know why but
she knows that when
She's all alone feels
Like it's all coming down
She won't turn around
The shadows are long
And she fears if she cries
That first tear
The tears will not stop
Raining down

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day what's lost can be found
You stand in the rain

She won't make a sound
Alone in this fight with herself
And the fears whispering
If she stands, she'll fall down
She wants to be found but
The only way out is through
everything she's running from
Wants to give up and lie down

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day what's lost can be found
You stand in the rain

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
Stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day what's lost can be found

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day what's lost can be found
You stand in the rain. "

So I will stand in the rain, and let it crash down, I just can't give up, and I can't give in. And NO ONE is GOING TO DRAG ME DOWN!!!

On a high...not literally...

this sums up a lot of my perception on life and everything else. Its better with music but this works too...

I'm on a high, I'm on a high
there's nothing more to it.
We are the sea and the sky
and the blue that runs through it, yeah.

and there are some who say there are so many things I need
so I run or I fight and I crawl or I scream and I bleed
I bleed, I bleed

well, it's a lie it's a lie - don't you believe it.
if you're fine then you're fine - it's all how you see it.
oh, there never will be no conspiracy of happiness.

I'm on a high I'm on a high
and there's nothing more to it
I have the sun, it's a star
why should I refuse it

and there are so many reasons I could give you why I should be down
there's not enough money or time and my love you're not around
around, around

but it's a lie it's a lie - don't you believe it.
if you're fine then you're fine - it's all how you see it.
oh, there never will be no conspiracy of happiness.

you're alive you're alive - how else could you hear me?
you are fine, you are fine - there's nothing worth fearing
'cause there never will be no conspiracy of happiness

I'm on a high, on a high
we are the sea and the sky
I'm on a high, on a high
I'm on a high

It's a lie, It's a lie don't you believe it
'Cause I've tried and I've tried, and I can't really see it
Yeah, I'm trapped inside my conspiracy of happiness
said I was yours, you were mine but I didn't really mean it
and I lied and I lied
and I wish you hadn't seen it
'cause I'm trapped inside my conspiracy of happiness
I'm on a high, on a high, there's nothing more to it, yeah.

- Duncan Sheik, On a High

I decide how to respond to things, I decide to be happy and NO ONE can tell me what makes me happy, you don't have to do what the "popular" people say or do. You can be happy with who and what you truly are. Don't be afraid to be who you truly are.